Trending Today: Scarlett Johanssoning …
The Emmy’s are all the rage right now, with everyone celebrating the wins or lamenting the losses of their favorite actors, actresses, and shows, but for all the excitement, the big awards are not the biggest topic trending today. Let us turn from the small screen and focus instead on a stunning siren of the silver screen — a woman of enormous grace, beauty, and talent. I speak, of course, of the gorgeous Scarlett Johansson, although unfortunately, her acting chops are not the reason she’s become a source of hot gossip. No — although Scarlett has managed to become an internet meme all in her own, her prodigious talents are not the cause…
I’m not sure if you’ve heard (yet I can’t believe that you haven’t) but, like many stars before her, Scarlett suffered from a cell phone mishap in the not too recent past. She’s not the first celebrity who’s had her cell phone hacked and I’m sure she won’t be the last, but somehow the public seems to expect it more from celebutantes like Paris Hilton. As a result, they’ve gone absolutely banana sandwich over this particular clustermug.
See, there was more at stake here than just a bunch of famous phone numbers. Like many starlets before her, Scarlett had some naked photos hiding in her phone. They are the main cause of all the madness, of course, but not for the reasons you might think. There’s something so fishy about these photos that the FBI have long since been involved. I’ll be honest, I don’t understand the full details myself, and that’s okay, because that’s not the point right now. The point is a certain saucy photo that showed Miss Scarlett … from the back side, let’s say.
The result of that photo, which is getting DMCA’d off every website it appears on faster than you can say “nudie shot,” is a less painful replacement for planking: Scarlett Johanssoning. Yes, this is a real thing, and yes, lots of people are doing it. In fact, it’s being done by many folks who should never, ever want to bare their bums to anyone who isn’t bound by love or marriage to see them.
To wit, people are posing naked with their backs facing a mirror, taking photos over their shoulders, and capturing the reflections of their butts, ala Scarlett. This is odd only because the public has been exposed to countless celebrity nudie shots, and while many people have been very excited by those photos, no one’s sought to mimic them.
So my questions: do you think you’ll ever go gaily Scarlett Johanssoning, either publicly or in the relative privacy of your own boudoir? Or do you, like me, hope that this particular trend disappears very quickly and leaves little evidence that it ever existed? As an aside, wouldn’t it be smart for celebs to stop storing naked photos on their phones?
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